You Sugar Me All Night Long

Almost every diabetic can tell you the joys of yo-yo-ing blood sugar levels, especially at night. First, there's the waking up sweaty and shaky because of low glucose. Then ensues the fun part of having to try to get those levels back to normal. This usually consists of over-compensating and getting high blood sugar then having to start the process all over again. 

That sounds pretty miserable. And textbook. But I promised I'd give it to you straight: the REAL story of how things go down in my diabetic life. 

It usually starts with waking up at about 2am. Your fuzzy brain is asking questions like,

 "Who am I?"
 "Where am I?" 
 "What is life???"

You slowly start to realize (as you're wiping away under-boob sweat with your T-shirt) that you're not in a crappy, hallucinogenic dream, but that your blood sugar has dropped below normal levels. 




Panic ensues. Logically, you know that you should eat something that will raise your blood sugar to average levels. This means either suck on a few Life Savers (ironic, yeah?) or drink a glass of OJ. But noooooooo. What do you do? You eat the kitchen. The whole kitchen. Because you are a sweaty, shaky, irrational, hot mess who feels like death. Anything that maybe might have some carbs in it goes into your mouth simply because it's laying in the path of destruction. Bread and gatorade and ice cream, oh my!




At this point, your blood sugar is slowly raising up to normal levels, you stop sweating, and your brain clears up. The only problem is now you feel like a bear who just stuffed itself preparing for hibernation. Let the stomach-ache and the self-loathing begin. 

And here's a shocker- now your blood sugar is too HIGH. Surprising, right?

Quick! Panic again! Time for insulin, and LOTS of it!! I mean, you did just eat like it was your job. 

As promised, the cycle continues. Because it turns out you didn't actually eat quite as much as you thought you did, so naturally the insulin you took brings your blood sugar back to unsafe low levels. Lather, rinse, repeat.

And here's the harsh truth. I'll never get this right. Ever. I know what I SHOULD do. Years of experience, doctors visits, common sense, and diabetes education have taught me the right way to handle these situations. But no amount of theoretical logic can prepare you for the helpless, sweaty, woozy, irrational self you become when your body wakes you up screaming for sugar in order to stay conscious.